It has been a while.Since April.Here I am on a Carnival Cruise ship docked at Nassau the Bahamas.I should never have let D talk me into coming on the cruise.She didn't save enough money for us to have a good time so it's a wasted effort.I've had to push her all over the ship and we had a falling out at the beach at Nassau because I had problems pushing her across the sand.She actually hit me on the arm.So it's over as far as our doing anything else worthwhile on this vacation.I'll never go on vacation with her again.The money would have been much better spent paying bills.
I wish I had never met her.I only got involved with her because I needed someone to look after my kids.I didn't expect J to be such a nucklehead so I can't blame her for his failings. I didn't know she would be so mean to R and get R so intimidated she can't learn to think straight.It's bad.I wanted something good but while D's family has prospered mine has suffered.D has been bad for me and bad for mykids.And that's a shame.
I can look at the guys with the nice looking wives on the ship and think of Rose and wish she were here with me.I envy those guys.God blessed them and he cursed my family for some unexplained reason. I can look at the nice looking young women, the Paris Hilton wannabe in her bikini and the others and remember when Rose was young and beautiful and wipe the tears from my eyes and curse the days since March 12, 2001.It's bad when you lose your manhood and know in your hardest of hearts you're no longer a man .You're scarcely a human being anymore.I've lost all of that.I'm an android.No longer a man.A shadow of my former self.Just holding on for R's sake, for the sake of my daughter as Rose and mom and dad would want me to. That's all I have left.
The NJ detective dropped the case of my friend.I know she's dead.I guessI should have expected a missing persons detective to be incompetent.I tried to help but there's nothing I can do.
Johnia Berry.I don't know what to do there.Check out the medical center down there and try to find out who JA's friends are and hope one of his friends can provide info to solve the case.Put myself at risk and maybe kill two birds with one stone.My legacy, such as it is, so I can end things on a high note.
I wish I had never met her.I only got involved with her because I needed someone to look after my kids.I didn't expect J to be such a nucklehead so I can't blame her for his failings. I didn't know she would be so mean to R and get R so intimidated she can't learn to think straight.It's bad.I wanted something good but while D's family has prospered mine has suffered.D has been bad for me and bad for mykids.And that's a shame.
I can look at the guys with the nice looking wives on the ship and think of Rose and wish she were here with me.I envy those guys.God blessed them and he cursed my family for some unexplained reason. I can look at the nice looking young women, the Paris Hilton wannabe in her bikini and the others and remember when Rose was young and beautiful and wipe the tears from my eyes and curse the days since March 12, 2001.It's bad when you lose your manhood and know in your hardest of hearts you're no longer a man .You're scarcely a human being anymore.I've lost all of that.I'm an android.No longer a man.A shadow of my former self.Just holding on for R's sake, for the sake of my daughter as Rose and mom and dad would want me to. That's all I have left.
The NJ detective dropped the case of my friend.I know she's dead.I guessI should have expected a missing persons detective to be incompetent.I tried to help but there's nothing I can do.
Johnia Berry.I don't know what to do there.Check out the medical center down there and try to find out who JA's friends are and hope one of his friends can provide info to solve the case.Put myself at risk and maybe kill two birds with one stone.My legacy, such as it is, so I can end things on a high note.
posted by WOLF PACK LEDGER at
4:44 PM
2 Comments
